Have had a crush on a woman I see at the gym for a while - she didn’t seem approachable in person so I sent her a rose on Hinge and we matched and she immediately recognized me.
We talked for a while and I asked her to go out for a drink. She had friends visiting and then was going on vacation but she gave me her number and told me she’d let me know and to text her. I texted her and after a few days of texting infrequently (more so on my end, I would answer once or twice a day) she asked if I was going out on a Saturday night and if so, that we should meet up.
She ended up having a family emergency that same night / weekend. She stayed in touch throughout that and eventually said she would still love to go out when she’s back in the area and she would text me. After I learned about her family situation I didn’t push on going out, I was just supportive, I wanted her to focus on her family.
We didn’t talk for 6 days or so, she texted me earlier this week and said she would be back the following day so I asked her out and we went out for drinks two days ago. When she got there I greeted her normally and the first thing she said to me when she got to the date was “do I recognize you from the gym?” And I said “uhh yeah the first thing you said to me was that you recognized me from xyz gym” and she said “haha oh ya I guess I haven’t seen you there in a while”. Just an overall weird / awkward opening.
Overall the date went well, she seemed nervous - she dropped her phone on the floor, was playing w/ her hair, but we joked / laughed/ flirted and lasted 2.5 hours or so. We also talked about past dating experiences and eventually discussed a few key compatibility points / values which we align on which was a good sign - she wants a traditional relationship which seems like she wants a man to lead.
We live somewhat close to each other so we walked home from the bar. We passed my apartment on the walk back which I pointed out - I don’t remember exactly what was said but basically instead of leaving her to walk home by herself I said I’d walk her home which she appreciated. Then when I dropped her off I said what’s your week looking like, and she said she was going home to see her family but she’d be back early next week. I said ok sounds good let’s go out again and grab dinner and she said “ok I’ll text you” and then quickly followed up with “actually you text me”. I laughed and said ok goodnight and hugged her and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Based on the vibe I thought going for a real kiss would have been forcing it so I didn’t go for it.
As I said above before we matched on Hinge I would see her at the gym. The next morning after our date I saw her when I was working out. She waved and smiled but we didn’t talk during our workout, while we were on our date she said she doesn’t like to talk at the gym, I was teasing her that she was super closed off / unapproachable when I saw her at the gym even though I wanted to so I left it alone but shot my shot when she popped up on Hinge (also for context and as you’ll see in another post I made, in the past I noticed her subtly checking me out at the gym). When I was leaving the gym I was waiting for the elevator and she walked around the corner to take the elevator out at the same time - we had a short interaction that was normal and warm but between leaving the elevator and where the entrance is there is a narrow hallway with a juice bar. She stopped to get something and mumbled like “bye” or “see you later” which wasn’t fully audible so I kept walking and said goodbye and have a good day and just left. There wasn’t a formal goodbye haha, and the way it ended had me questioning things, just seemed awkward although I just acted normally.
I haven’t texted her yet but I made a reservation for us to go to dinner this upcoming week. I appreciate she’s shown interest by giving me her number without me asking and then following through after telling me she would let me know when she was back. I think what she said at the end of our first date (quickly correcting the “I’ll text you” to “you text me”) could have been her being genuinely interested in another date but wanting me to follow through on saying I wanted to see her again, but after the gym interaction I’m second guessing myself. The end of the gym interaction and the first thing she said to me on our date could have just been her being nervous / awkward but I’m second guessing myself now.
She’s going back home this weekend given her family situation is ongoing and I know she’ll be there through Monday / Tuesday so I wanted to give her space. I was going to text her around when she told me she was coming back.
I’m definitely overthinking this but wanted to get some opinions on the situation overall. Is she still into me? Should I not wait too long to text her to ask her out for a second date?
